"In the unlikely event that the cabin losses it's pressure, oxygen masks will fall from the overhead compartment, yank down on the cord and place on your face, please make sure to put your mask on before you help a child or dependant" ( something like that!) "
This is the best advice ever! And as parent advice goes, this one is most applicable to all parents, no matter what the family situation. Take care of you first and the rest will fall into place. I work with parents, whose children are often under the age of eight, I repeat this statement many times,sometimes I don't stop saying it -- I have even written this goal into family service plans. No matter how many times I hear I have no time, no support, no friends etc.. We can all come up with a few idea's to help take care of you..
For the single parent...
- Trust your friends, ask for help ( even if it is 20 minutes in your house so you can have a bath)
- Get to know other parents, schedule play dates -- they morph into drop offs -- so take turns.
- Ikea - 40 minutes in the ball pool for kiddo and 40 minutes with a cup of coffee or a cheap lunch someone else makes for you. ( All this for $5.00)
- Find a babysitter, ask around someone knows a good one.
- Pay someone to clean your house ( Groupon!!!) and seriously sit and enjoy a cup of tea.
- Have time without your kids. - give yourself 30 minutes a day without kids
- Relax, pick your battles and get help from those you trust and love - ASK
- Breath, and let go -- sometimes they are going to yell, scream and tantrum (if at home and not a danger to you or anyone else including themselves - turn on the ipod and listen.)
- Patience, Patience Patience - is only possible if you take a break - plan one and do it.
- Date your partner - even if planned and don't talk about your kid ( this take practice)
- Give yourself at least 30 minutes a day to not "do" -- much harder for some then others
- Remember the you before kids ( likes and dislikes -- and indulge in them -- I love travel, now I travel with and without my daughter)
- You don't have to be friends with your child's friends parents - but if you like them even better you can help with each others date nights by minding each others kids.
- Asking for help is important , and sometimes help is something as easy as going to someone else's house for dinner!
No one can be with kids all the time, they are hard work, and many of your non-parent friends would be more then happy to spend time with you -- without your kid - so make time. We all love our families, we all love our kids - but seriously for your families health you need to do more then just take care of them. no matter if you work, stay at home or whatever your family situation is -- you must take time for you.
What do you do to take care of yourself?
melanie
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