Parenting is 20% about the kids, the othe r80% is about the parent

LAUGH
To be cheerful, pleasant, mirthful, lively, or brilliant; to sparkle.

Sometimes while parenting it can be hard to find laughter, but most of the time, your day is what you make it.
In my life, parenting has been and will continue to be the best, most challenging, most frustrating and most important thing I do it my life.
Having said that -- sometimes  I am tired, and would love nothing better then to escape into the life of a city girl, shopping and travelling the world. This thought usually only occurs when it has been a challenging day.

There is something wonderful about spunky kids. At five my daughter could defend anyone in a court of law, her interest in details, science and sense of what she thinks is right -- is outstanding. But WOW when she has a tantrum  she is a force to be reckoned --It awe's me.

I go through life most days with this amazing little human being who is wonderful is so many ways -- then this little tantrum monster comes out - this is very rare now, but a recent flare reminds me of all the parenting Jay and I had to do!. Don't think I don't know she comes by it honestly -- I do, I have temper tantrums myself - not over the same things my five year old does.. but definitely I have them.
And while I joke and tell my husband I am listing her for sale on Kiji - I wouldn't change the challenges either-- but damn having the traits you dislike about yourself mirrored in your child can be ..Frustrating!

I like that she is not the a person who is going to sit in the corner and disappear into the wallpaper as she grows up, - her SK teacher mentioned to Jay that she is going to grow up either to be a Lobbyist or a Lawyer for human rights. Like I said a keen sense of justice. But wow the challenges of raising a spunky opinionated kiddo are large, and her frustration can be large too.

Parenting has it is challenges and I think we sometimes forget that all parents struggle with something, there are no "normal" kids out there.. they are just kids.. each with a different set of challenges.

I haven't slept through the night since she left her crib - not because I am anxious -- because of night terrors, sleep clinics and iron deficiency.
I wasn't blessed with a kid who ate her vegetables just because she should - it took a year of hiding, of finding the trick of the "i don't want it bite" - now salad is a regular fixture ( thank you daycare team),
I had a little feisty girl who hit , bit and screamed when she didn't get her way -- interesting the behaviours that come when iron is low.
I have a little girl who still gets upset when the vacuum is on too long. ( did you know most kids don't like loud noises? - this is actually very common especially during 5 years of age when children have irrational fears because they are learning about fear)
I  have a little girl who asks lots of questions I don't always know the answer too ( thank you Internet!)
As a mom, I worry what she eats ( but have learned the "in a week" rule - get all her nutrients in plus a daily vitamin for her iron .. and I am happy).
I learned that I need her community of teachers, other parents, and daycare staff to help us ensure consistency of expectations. Which means if they need my support to get a lesson taught, or they need me to back them up when an issues arise or I need  them - we work it out. It als means I am grateful beyond belief that she has a fantastic teacher this year!!! And daycare staff who simply get it, when I say ARGH!

The perfect child, the perfect parent -- they are Myths.. and I think part of learning about being a parent includes learning this big lesson -- they will be alright.. they will be who they are nutured and supported into being.  They are not all going to be rocket scientists ( though wow wouldn't that be sooooo cool) but with love and support and the care of friends and family -- they will figure it out. And the best part .. if we are really lucky we will see them become adults who actively live their own lives.. well.

Parenting is only 20 percent about them the other 80%  is about us --- we have sooooooooooooo much to learn on this journey so, all the mom's  and Dad's with grown up kids, almost grown up kids-- share your knowledge, your idea's and help us thorugh the stages, even when we think we are the only ones who have ever experienced parentin this way!!