The sounds are fading...

This past weekend I reflected on the news that I have low frequency hearing loss in both ears, my left is a little less affected currently then my right. I will be getting a hearing aid for my right ear in the next few weeks ( has to be fitted and ordered) and then in a couple of years they expect the left ear will require one. As it is a degenerative type of hearing loss, they expect it to get worse over time. I am losing the volume of my life - but....

The good news
- technology and hearing aids are incredible I put one on, and I felt like I had surround sound in my head!
- I will hear sounds I haven't heard for a long time I am guessing
- I will hear the depth of music as it plays ( this has been missing for me)
- and if in time the sounds fade away ... well I will celebrate the sounds until then.

The fear of the "unknown"silence,  fear of a future without the sound of laughter - scares me.. but it is not a certainty and I cannot live my life now worried that one day I may not have my hearing.

So I will listen to music I have never heard -- opera's and symphonies, i will feel the laughter in my childs chest and I will memorize every sound in the world. As I celebrate what I have been so lucky to have.

While right now I feel like I have "lost" something - that has likely been fading for a longtime. I have become noticiably more aware of what I am missing, since Friday. So to say I am sad, is the best description of how this has made me feel. Talking to my loved ones this weekend helped, even the rambling of my conversation with my sister - one of a select few that can follow my brain jumps, to the laughter my husband brought out of me and to the comfort only a mom can give -- thanks everyone for listening when I needed to be heard.

I am greatful for the sounds I use to take for granted
I am greatful for the family who will make me see the bright side
I am greatful for the life I am so lucky to have .. there are worse things that could happen

Like I have been reading --- Happiness is a choice we CHOOSE to make..

this is just a bump along my road in life..

Live Love Laugh ... Listen to the world