Showing posts with label Happiness Traps. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Happiness Traps. Show all posts

30.3.10

The things we do because we think we will feel better

In my previous blog - we all learned what made me feel better! Buying purses - for multiple reasons -- but when it came down to it - it was becuase it made me feel better or happy - they always fit, they never judged and they made me feel like I could belong -- wow that is alot to expect from a sewn together piece of material!!

Happiness Traps - the things we do to find happiness (for much more detail please check out he book What Happy People Know) - I am going ot look at how all five have impacted me - if they did:


1. Buying HapinessOh yes -- have done this - call it a "treat" call it whatever -- I have attempted to buy myself out of a rut ( usually couldn't find clothes to fit), or I was lonely or I was desperate for friendship or when I feel I did something good - extended the pleased with self feeling by - yup buying happiness was something that made me feel like I was good enough.. not sure for who or what.. but I did it.. and still do once in awhile ( now I am just aware of it!)

2. Finding Hapiness through what brings pleasure - food, drugs, etc.. (this actually is an interesting one to read about as it talks about how when we have more-- we want more becuase we adapt to what we have) This is something we all do to some degree - the chocolate bar you really shouldn't be having - but your lonely so what the heck -- or maybe you drink to numb pain ( hench finding happiness) the crack addict who is always after the feeling of the first high. Food was my choice -- smoking once was the espcape I used to get away from stress-- so yeah I could see this being a trap.

3. Trying to be Happy by resolving the past -- I use to think the only way to get over something was to talk it to death -- I don't believe that anymore, I also doin't think it is 100% necessary - the concept that unless you talk it out, you won't have happiness is not one that can apply to everyone. Talking does help me - but not about all things -  For me sometimes it is simply a matter of letting it go, holding on and over talking it can cause a continuation of a pattern as well in my mind.

4. Trying to be happy by overcoming "weakness" -- I can see how this is a trap - as you fail - you try harder - you fail again, you try harder  - constantly fixing yourself . This is a hard one to avoid - because it is promoted everywhere - diets, get organized, be better, quit this , stop doing this , stop doing that.. if you would just stop eating, you would be happy!! Hmmm ---reminds me of advertising. Show them who they want to be ( the beautiful girl who everyone adores, then tell them they just have to overcome their eating habits, then they will be happy - like the girls in the pictures)

5. Trying to force happiness : I don't believe I have ever done this - I know that positive thinking and projecting positive thoughts can help you deal with issues, but I have never forced or pretended to be happy - I can't comment much more on this one.

It is interesting for me to look back at what I wrote - I don't try to edit my thoughts when I blog -- this makes me happy ( spelling and grammer issues aside - I write what I think and feel, and to edit would not be honest)

I have been taking pictures today of things in my day that make me happy - I plan to put a post up about that soon -- but I wonder do you fall into these happiness traps?

Chat soon -- hope to see some of your pictures soon from yesturdays post.